Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass. ~Anton Chekhov

I have hated words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right. ~Markus Zusak

Tuesday 3 January 2012

Happy New Year

Ten...

The world started to move too fast. I could feel my heart beating through my eardrums as it shook my entire being into a state of awareness. I caught sight of you, but you were gone before it really registered.

Nine...

Someone shuffled behind me, knocking me forward and, like a wave, music and heat flooded over me. I heard a mumbled apology from behind me that brushed past my shoulder with its speaker, but it didn’t really matter. I was now lost and confused.

Eight...

As I tip-toed my way above the crowds, all I could see was an ocean of heads and hairstyles, none of which I recognised, just like no one recognises the drops in the ocean even as they splash over your face. I landed back on my heels defeated.

Seven...

I twisted my shoulder towards the bar, opening my body up to a crashing, charging fool who stumbled straight into me and sent me tumbling to the floor.

Six...

The fall took exactly a second. The countdown told me that, and in that time, I saw a room of faces dance like a spinning top in front of my eyes as the lights behind them stretched into towers.

Five...

I hit the floor harder than I expected. My back bounced upwards, and for a flash, I thought I was floating, until it landed again and the pain rushed around me. Even through the relentless thud of the music, I could hear the laughter. You always can. Someone laughs at you and a missile launch couldn’t block out the sound.

Four...

There’s an arm wrapped around mine now, and I was lifted upwards. My heart revved inside my chest, making the tips of my fingers tingle. I was up now. Every hair on my arm seemed alive, touching the world and feeding back to me.

Three...

My friend stood right in front of me, mouthing something and looking slightly concerned, but I looked right past him. She’s right there. My heart chimed like a clock.

Two...

I paused. Everything seems perfect. I’m there. She’s there. That’s what New Years Eve is about. That moment that burns itself into your memory like a brand on your life. I pushed past my friend, stretched out my arm as far as my fingers would reach, and just brushed the side of her arm. She turned slightly.

One...

Now she’s right in front of me. I could almost see my reflection in her eyes, or maybe it’s my soul. God know I’d been lost in those eyes often enough. Like sunrise, a smile broke onto her face, and all the nerves popped inside me, dissipating away. Without knowing, I could feel my hand again the soft white of her face as I ran it slowly upwards, stroking through her blusher with my fingertips. I leant my head in. She did the same. I felt the gentle caress of her top lip against my bottom lip.

Happy New Year.

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